Mid-Life Women's Health

Mid-life passage to menopause

Article and Tips supplied by Annie Hinkley
 
Mid-life changes can start to be felt in our late 30’s and early 40’s. Are you…

• waking in the middle of the night?
• feeling anxious, bloated, tired?
• experiencing memory loss, hot flushes?
• feeling your primary relationship needs to change or go?
• feeling like you are losing your identity?
  

Then you may be experiencing the passage to mid-life which for women is known as menopause. Much like the passage to puberty, the passage to menopause can be a ten-year transition,- physically, spiritually and emotionally. This is a normal transition and not an “illness” as some would have us believe. And, as with all transitions, it is a time of change. And whenever there is change, even if it is for the better, there is loss.

Many of you are living with adolescents. What is this time like? What do you observe?

Adolescence is a time of rapid physical and emotional change: hormones are raging, new aches and pains appear, skin changes and the body is growing in new ways. Emotionally, you are all over the place—you feel rebellious-the need to “get outta this place.” It is a time of loss: a loss of innocence during which the predictability of childhood slips away; mood swings are the name of the game, sexual libido grows strong and your relationships with authority are tested. Doing what you’ve always done to get by no longer seems right, nor does it work. You are transitioning to a new phase of your life.

Fast forward 30 to 40 years. You are once again entering a time of rapid change: hormones are raging, new aches and pains are appearing, your skin might be losing its luster and lines are becoming more noticeable. Adolescent acne might even return. Your body is growing in new ways-perhaps you are gaining weight. Even if you are maintaining your weight, you notice that your favorite jacket is tight in the upper arms and shoulders. You have mood swings and sometimes you feel all over the place-anger, frustration, tears, anxiety- and you feel rebellious- a need to “get outta this place” or a feeling that “this relationship has to go.” At a minimum, the relationship might feel like it needs to change.. A woman’s sexual libido can plummet. It’s a time of loss: a parent has died, a relationship ends, you or your partner loses their job, you or a dear friend is dealing with a life-threatening illness. Your relationship with authority, with the “shoulds” in your life, is tested. Doing what you have always done- your coping mechanisms and addictions, no longer seems to work. Welcome to mid-life. Welcome to menopause.

But wait!! There is GOOD NEWS!!! THIS time, you get to do the changes with a lots of life’s wisdom under your belt. This time, you can reclaim your dreams and your authentic self. Midlife for a woman can be a time to discover her truth and find her voice. This is your passage to POWER!

TIME MAGAZINE  dedicated an entire issue (22 August 2005) to this topic of female passage.  Using the theme of “Baby Boomers do it differently,” the magazine gave evidence of “women of a certain age” seizing the moment to re-invent themselves.
After years of compounded, cumulative stress from ladder-climbing, barrier-breaking and multi-tasking, many women feel that in the process of getting the promotion, having kids,  managing the household and helping aging parents, they set aside something important they want to retrieve—their DREAMS!  Many are starting a business in which they have a sense of control over their time, a sense of adventure, and a chance to have fun and work in a creative environment.  Mid-life crisis?  No, Mid-life re-appraisal and re-thinking of what’s important in our lives. 

So, if this is a time for re-birth and re-claiming our POWER, what are some of the things that can help on this journey?

One: Get educated: read, research, attend seminars and empower yourself so you are able to make informed decisions about you physical well-being.

Two:  Get help: see a sympathetic health professional who is up-to-date on safe options and assist you to optimum health and well-being.  See a counselor/therapist to have a guided conversation with yourself so you can get clear about your priorities; see a couple counselor to get help with your relationship.

Three: Get moving: do dailly walks in nature, do yoga, Pilates, resistance training, take a dance class.  The important thing is to get those good-feeling endorphins happening…

Four: Get creative:  mid-life can be a time of intense creativity.  This is the time to nurture your soul. You have spent a lifetime nurturing others; indeed, from age 14 until menopause, every cell in a woman’s body is programmed to nurture others.  This is reinforced by our cultural and societal  conditioning.  Menopause is a time when those urges transition more towards self-nurturing.  So, what have you always wanted to do?  What is the activity that, when you are doing it, you lose track of time?  What is your art?  Is it painting, writing, singing, going back to school, learning an instrument?  For me, it is quilting; you need sunglasses for my quilts and I can get lost for hours in the brilliant colors and patterns colors.

There are currently 2.5 million women in Australia and New Zealand between the ages of 40 and 59.  Add in the USA and Europe and the number leaps to 116.5 million.    That’s  a lot of voices.  Why not approach this transition to wisdom consciously and discover your truth and find your voice?  Clearly the planet needs us to speak, loud and clearly, now.